Our Mysterious Sexuality

Experience bears out the definition of purity as reverence for mystery.

No one is scandalized at seeing people eat in public, or read in buses, or listen to music on the street, but they are shocked at dirty shows, foul books, or undue manifestations of affection in public. It is not because we are prudes, nor because we were educated in Catholic schools nor because we have not yet come under the liberating influence of a Freud, but because these aspects of a mystery so deep, so personal, so incommunicable, that we do not want to see it vulgarized or made common.

You heard it from our dear Bishop Fulton Sheen, it’s clear as day. This wondrous virtue of purity (that no one seems to care about anymore) is that one thing that reveres mystery. Our sexuality which is so personal and intimate when revealed to the world as if it were for show is a cause for scandal because we know from the depths of our souls that we don’t want this beautiful mystery to be bastardized!

Because our sexuality is  so inexplicably mysterious every person can be awe-stunned by the mystery revealed. It’s no wonder that our sexuality is the easiest marketing tool.

What can we do about it?

Allow me to quote my fiance’s Facebook post realization which he composed after we watched Jason and Crystalina Evert speak to us in the Philippines last 7 September 2013 (which incidentally is exactly a year and a day away from our upcoming wedding on 8 September 2014):

What is a great deception for our sexuality?

Our sexual desire and passion is a call to action, a call to real love, a call to service and self-giving, but instead because of our weakness and Satan’s cunning deceptions, it leads us back to ourselves, only to find it empty, dry, and lifeless. Then it becomes a downward spiral as men and women continue to search for real love only to get imitations and fakes.

What we should do is not to repress this sexual desire…this “call to action”, but to channel it to the right direction, to spur us on to real love, service, self-giving, and life. It is only then that we can truly find real and lasting joy, pleasure, and happiness through our sexuality.

Jason Evert: Being passive is wrong, for a man is an initiator and the one to take action, while a woman does not become passive as well but receive actively as man gives.

This simple quote from Jason Evert is echoed by Bishop Fulton Sheen when he commented ironically about the youth, about man and woman:

In youth, this awesomeness before the mystery (of sex) manifests itself in a woman’s timidity, which makes her shrink from precocious or too ready to surrender of her secret. In a man, the mystery is revealed in chivalry to women, not because he believes that woman is physically weaker but because of the awe he feels in the presence of mystery.

Let’s zero-in on man and woman respectively:

Men are meant to be chivalrous to women to respect to the mystery of sexuality. On behalf of the women all over the world, I hear you, bro! We’re begging you to have a lot of respect for us women. Feminism is asking for respect in the form of this “equality.” When there is chivalry, there is respect for the differences of men and women.

Women are asked to be “timid from the precocious” or to be timid in surrendering her secret. To clarify, using the word “timid” is not to emphasize the woman’s lack of power.

On the contrary, women HOLD that secret which asks men for chivalry from. Women need to safeguard this secret with all of their being! This incredible secret is the intermingling of love and life. There are no synonyms to this secret. A thick book series couldn’t possibly be enough to describe and study this secret. It’s so completely beyond us, mere human beings, that  the explanation of the mystery is in the bearing of new life in the mother’s womb. It’s the actuality of bringing to this world a new and unique human being.

Women are meant to value the grand power that they have in their entire makeup. Women are meant to thrive in what makes their secret a part of them. Women are meant to hold onto their secret and never reveal it to anyone, to any man, until she reveals it to just one man in the name of God.

It's better when we work together

It’s better when we work together

with the inspiring Everts

with the inspiring Everts

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Marriage: The Right Way

Oh happy weekend! Cheers to my second weekend as a working woman! I’m just enjoying this day reading good news about this man who got married to his wife the right way. (Read the article in the link below)

Gosh… This article represents the male perspective on waiting for the presentation of pure and real love in an unrepeatable ceremony (let alone, a Sacrament) against the background of the mockery of such a hedonistic culture that is in constant collaboration with a society of media-driven consumers. *deep and heavy sigh*

First of all, I applaud his audacity to present his values to the world of media and for being very upfront about the experience and inner commotion that occurred during and after his wedding day. And I’m not just saying that because he was very sweet and romantic in speaking of his wife.

Secondly, this article made me think a lot about how the Philippines has glorified the ceremony and not its representation. I read another article on how weddings have become all about the frou-frou and less about the love. Of course, I can’t deny that women would want to have all the best details in their weddings done right (in all its aspects). I know I would. I’m always so fascinated and awe-struck by the beautiful prenuptial pictures and most especially the wedding day pictures. But, as I’ve scanned through a lot of albums I only wonder, well, what’s next?

Anyway, I’m not one to judge because I wouldn’t really know by experience but I trust Manila’s Archbishop Tagle’s reaction and suggestions toward these wedding frivolities as can be read here.

Lastly, his conviction on this is deeply sincere plight for chastity is as encouraging and motivating as it can get. Why do we need ‘safe’ sex if we’re meant for true love?

Waiting till the wedding night -getting married the right way.